Why & How To Start A Meditation Practice
They say now that it only takes 17 days to build a habit (not 21). I’m on my 29th day straight of meditation with the app Calm but joining a group with other beginners will strengthen my practice, I believe. I started a new journey of really deepening my meditation practice by enrolling to a meditation class for four weekends.
Last week, I started questioning my “counselor skills” and I felt that I failed in listening and empathy. It saddens me… I was faced with anger, resentment, hurt, doubts and so many other feelings. But don’t we all have these moments?
These moments remind us to slow down to look at ourselves and reflect on what’s happening inside us. Listen to our bodies and ask ourselves, “Why am I feeling this?” and “What can I do to better serve others?”. We need to work on ourselves first before we can help others.
In a culture that glorifies self neglect and being busy is a badge of honor, it is hard to hit the pause button and take care of ourselves first. When things start to fall apart is when we take notice of how we have neglected ourselves and the important people and moments in our lives. Meditation helps us get there. This is the moment when we stay still and do nothing.
When I teach yoga to kids, we play a game I call “The Meditation Game” and I tell them that it is the hardest game of all. The new students ask me why is it hard and I say that it is hard because we need to stay still and do nothing but breathe. They tell me that the game does not sound hard. I told them that you have to sit with your legs crossed, thumbs and forefingers pressed together on top of your knees, keep your back straight and close your eyes and breathe. They are not interested very much until I tell them that whoever can stay in this position the longest without moving, talking or opening their eyes is the winner. They eagerly follow the directions and in less than a minute, some kids will open their eyes, pick their noses, ask for their mommies, sing, talk to the other kids, walk out, stand up, etc. etc. You got the picture and it can be pretty funny, especially those who open just one eye to see who if they are winning.
Meditation is not easy because we are not used to keeping our minds still. But with practice, deeper understanding and patience, we can get there and the benefits of it is worth all the work. But why is it work, eh? We only need to stay still and quiet our minds… =)
My Suggestions In Starting A Meditation Practice:
- Checkout the apps Headspace and Calm
- Do the challenges on the apps (I started with the 7 day challenge on Headspace and I just finished the 21 days challenge on Calm)
- Read the books: The 8 Minute Meditation, When Things Fall Apart and Wherever You Go There You Are
- Join a program or a class (support is good to have)
- Reward yourself after you finish the meditation challenges. You don’t need to because the joy of meditation is the reward itself.
After 29 days of practicing meditation, I know that I still need a lot of work. But I can feel the changes in me just by noticing how much I breathe more.
As I reflect on my carelessness and mindless actions, I was reminded by Pema Chodron’s words:
“It’s painful to face how we harm others, and it takes a while. It’s a journey that happens because of our commitment to gentleness and honesty, our commitment to staying awake, to being mindful. Because of mindfulness, we see our desires and our aggression, our jealousy and our ignorance. We don’t act on them, we just see them. Without mindfulness, we don’t see them.”
I’m looking for loving kindness towards myself, to become more self aware and to be mindful of my words and actions… I got a lot of work to do. But I’m hoping to reach these thru meditation.